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(no subject)

Jan. 19th, 2010 | 06:56 pm

i hate being the fat sister. for ages now i've actually felt okay about myself. i'm one of the thinnest girls in my year, get along with mostly everyone and have quite a good life generally.
but tonight my mum bought me and my sister dresses and i got to choose first which one i wanted and i went for one that my sister grabbed and my mum said 'i meant that one for your sister 'cos it's a smaller size.' at that point i felt like i had gained 50 pounds in a second. me and my sister wear the same size of clothes, yet my mum see's me as being much bigger (okay, well one size bigger. an 8. when i'm a 6.) now i'm starting to see myself that way. noticeably bigger. and i want to shrink down.

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it's been a while and about 20 pounds.

Nov. 24th, 2009 | 10:17 pm
mood: determineddetermined

but i'm back with more of a drive than ever before and a horrible love for mars bars.

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(no subject)

May. 5th, 2009 | 11:17 pm

 my thighs are the biggest they have EVER been just now.
disgusting.

i just have to keep reminding myself that i need to regain control because i'm not doing this for me, i'm doing this for someone else, so they'l always remember me as thin and beautiful.

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(no subject)

Apr. 29th, 2009 | 05:52 pm

 i've just been eating what i want recently.
fail.

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(no subject)

Mar. 27th, 2009 | 01:29 pm

 emotional wreck.

fat emotional wreck.

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(no subject)

Mar. 19th, 2009 | 11:20 pm

 i hate my legs so much.
i can't do anything.

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life is looking up

Mar. 16th, 2009 | 09:28 pm

 i haven't posted in a while.
but my tummy is now toned - i just need to work on my legs and my bum.
and it'll be perfect. completely perfect in time for summer.

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(no subject)

Feb. 22nd, 2009 | 08:47 pm

 my friend died on friday night..
it feels really weird.
i don't think it's fully hit me yet, i'm still really really shocked.

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wobbly legs will be the death of me

Feb. 11th, 2009 | 09:25 pm

my legs are HORRIBLE.
i figure i have to lose about 10 pounds before i see a difference in them.
and before the summer!

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(no subject)

Feb. 2nd, 2009 | 10:11 pm

 fat fat fat fat fat.

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